God’s messages:

       

Forgive others. To forgive someone else’s shortcomings is to heal old wounds. This doesn’t mean it need be forgotten, as it is a lesson learned, nor does it mean to allow it to happen again. It only means to forgive, and to allow it to heal.

Never regret or dwell on yesterday’s mistakes or decisions.  They are a part of the learning curve that is called life.  The greatest gift you can give yourself is to start each day anew taking what you have learned from yesterday, putting it to good use today, and bettering yourself and your life with it tomorrow.

Hope will turn the cold into warmth,  your weakness into strength, and your sadness into joy.

Give yourself some time. Whether you need time to think it over, time to heal, time to have fun, or time for doing nothing whatsoever, it's yours if you just give time to yourself.

It is important to take time to see the beauty in the world that surrounds you. Watch a sunrise or sunset, observe the vibrant colors of nature's changing seasons, or count the stars on a moonless night. Enjoy the gift you have been given of life on this earth and all it has to offer.

All things are possible for those who believe.  Faith is sometimes the only thing you have, but what a gift it is.  With faith you can press on in the midst of adversity.  Have faith, and it will light your path.

when love failed

sometime in february 2009, i wrote an entry on love. being a girl who read books and watches movies a lot, i often daydream and pretend to be 'in character' in a fictional plot. though it might sound silly, believing in what seems unreal seems to satisfy my fascination of the make-believe world. my most favorite theme of all time: love story. these 'happily ever after' stories has given us too many unreasonable expectations such as finding our prince charming or perfect lover.

 i suppose we all, at one point, experienced falling in love. its one of the most amazing happenings in our life. it seems we cant get enough of it. falling is all about coming down, descending. love, on the other hand, has an uplifting power, so powerful that it can give you wings. then again, if you give it a deep thought, the phrase 'falling in love' certainly makes some sense, because the execution of falling eventually ends up in hitting the bottom. the prodigy is all too perceptible. you meet some special guy. magical moment happens. you're flying. overwhelmed by happy emotions, bliss and jubilation.

inevitably, however, the falling ceases. what goes up, must come down. you land, hard and flat on the face. all of a sudden, the love of your life proves less than worthy. their flaws becomes apparent. and so begins the tormenting process of falling out of love.

i always thought that break-ups are suppose to happen in movies but not to me. when it finally happened, i felt as though someone had just crushed  my heart, tearing it to pieces.  i was badly hurt. crying is something i do not usually indulge in, but the last few months, i have collected buckets of tears. a broken heart is almost the equivalent of grief. i wanted to change things and make them right but i don't know how. good sleep is hard to come by and crying to sleep has been a nightly habit. my emotions are all over the place.

i yearn for yesteryears  when all was right and perfect (or so i thought) in my world. i miss the happy girl that i was. not having my ex in my life just don't seem right. as in resembling a gloomy day in July! i crave for the moments of togetherness, when nothing else matters but the two of us.

healing a broken heart is not a simple course to take especially if you still love the person. whatever awful things that had materialized, they will withstand with the good that they have. love is a decision and forgiveness is a choice. everyday you love and everyday you forgive. not all love stories are derived from one's fanciful mind. yes, fairy tales do falter sometimes. but no matter how many times love fails me, i will persevere, endure and get on with it. lastly, love is candidly and plainly forgiving and accepting things.

in life

I haven't been in a blog mode for quite sometime now. Truthfully, there is so much to divulge and reveal from my recent predicament. On the positive side, i could not be oblivious of the lessons i have gained and how it taught me about the complexities and intricacies of life. Never ending, should i say.

One of these days, i will be again glued to this seat, face to face with my computer and drafting my fresh entry on my strife and how, up to now, i am coping and trying to live each day with conviction. I am honestly struggling and striving to come out adequate and pleasant in the eyes of other people.

In the meantime, i will try my best to take my first step in moving forward and piling up enough motivation and inspiration to keep me going in life. I am full of hope. My faith will deliver me wherever i want to go in life. I will always believe in love, with no explanations and no hesitations. Enough said.

Maya Angelou

Maya Angelou is an American author and poet. She is best known for her autobiographical books. Her works are inspiring, uplifting and encouraging. Indeed, a phenomenal woman!
I have compiled some of the greatest Maya Angelou quotes and I am sharing it to you:

• “I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” 

•  “I've learned that no matter what happens, or how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow."

•   “Never make someone a priority when all you are to them is an option.” 

•  “Love recognizes no barriers. It jumps hurdles, leaps fences, penetrates walls to arrive at its destination full of hope.” 

•  “You may encounter many defeats, but you must not be defeated. In fact, it may be necessary to encounter the defeats, so you can know who you are, what you can rise from, how you can still come out of it. ” 

•  “I've learned that regardless of your relationship with your parents, you'll miss them when they're gone from your life.” 

•  “I've learned that making a 'living' is not the same thing as 'making a life'.” 

•  “Nothing will work unless you do.” 

•  “To those who have given up on love: I say, "Trust life a little bit.” 

•  “Love life. Engage in it. Give it all you've got. Love it with a passion because life truly does give back, many times over, what you put into it.” 

 
But my personal favorite Maya Angelou quote of all time:
        
    “I've learned that I still have a lot to learn.”
     

Epic Fail

Life is not perfect. Not everything i wish in life can be granted. Its complexities and predicaments are bottomless. Its obscurities and mysteries are fathomless. Bumpy roads are boundless and is making me weary. When love can no longer sustain and conquer unknown battles, then its disastrous. Epic fail!

Almost there. Like uncovering the hidden pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. Like building castles in the sand in near completion. Like sweet dreams close to realization. Like a journey bordering on the supposed destination. But then, the rain begun pouring. The ocean flowed washing away built castles.
Suddenly awaken from a deep sleep, with a vivid dream. And the car rolled to a halt.

Nothing left but pain. When its more real, its more painful, they say. Happiness is fleeting and tricky. Play along. Hope unceasingly. And love persistently. God invented tomorrows, new beginnings and happy endings.



Photo credit: KC Concepcion

to blog or not to blog

days off from work is perfect for commencing a fresh and new blog post. that means i have something to rant or rave about. since this morning, i have been contemplating on what topic to write. i often find myself freezing in front of the computer with nothing in mind. so i decided, i might as well talk about blogging.

i call myself a blogger but not a pro. i write informally and casually with an unpredictable subject matter. i do not highlight grammar rules, punctuations and spellings. and my blog doesn't even attract a vast audience. i do not have guiding principles to live by in writing blogs. most of my chosen topics are randomly picked. but when i am either blissful or in a low state, then my desire to write is intensified.

just recently, my bf was a bit in awe or maybe shocked is a better word, after going through my blog site. it came as a surprise to him that i actually put my thoughts into writing. hahahaha!!! talk about discovering the other side of me. i mean the positive side of me, i hope. writing defines a part of me but not all of me. it will be an incessant journey for us unearthing each other's strengths and weaknesses.

not all my subject materials are engaging and inherently interesting. not at all times i make sense and easy to comprehend. and my writing style may not be witty and appealing. but then again, i just want to write. i consider myself fortunate that i am actually doing something that i love. this is what i call real fulfillment and joy!

the blogger cat is sleepy now. ZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzz....!!!!



Note: All photos were taken from the web. The blogger does not claim ownership of the photos used in this blog.

at my lowest point

Giving up is the closest option at this point. When everything else seems wrong and untimely, then I start questioning. Life is beautiful -- a cliche that is too good to be true. Perhaps lasting a relatively brief time. As in a catnap, you're suddenly awaken and pressing the snooze button is a necessity. Problems call for my attention from time to time. On a personal level, I am too preoccupied with the aspects of my life that are not going well for me. I still haven't got the hangs of it. And I am still learning the ropes. I am truthfully, still struggling and almost spilled out. I have cried and even wept. Even went to work sobber. I have done unintentional mistakes and hurt people. To which I regret at the end of the day. I am doing all that I could in my routine life in the hope of better consequences. But each time I wake up, then I realize that the world is still the same. None of my expectations came about and materialized. So tiring and debilitating.

"When life gives you lemons, make lemonade." This quote sounds funny but packed with sense. So, when life hands me lemons, what would I do with it? Be thankful for sure for its free. But if lemons represent trials and hardships, would I still be appreciative of the sweet gesture? Maybe not anymore. But maybe, I can still make the best out of bad or severe situation. Turning bad things into good ones and viewing life on a different perspective. After all, life is not perfect. Aiming for perfection is impossible. It is elusive and futile. Easier said than done, i know. To end, i must say that when life hands me lemons, I'll ask for salt and tequila! 

random thoughts at 3 am

~ this is the second of my old posts. i wrote this out of disappointment and dissatisfaction in life... : (

random thoughts @ 3am

August 29, 2008 by lei23-sc | Edit

Nothing in particular for me to talk about. But for the sake of updating my blog site, i am writing this entry hoping thoughts would randomly pour out of my head once i start hitting the keyboard. 

My shoutout (from my friendster profile) may not seem catchy at all. In fact, its just one of those quotes, lines or sayings one have probably seen in a book, in one of those published articles perhaps, or heard maybe from some famous personality interviewed on tv. Whew! Notice how i redundantly used the words probably, perhaps and maybe in one sentence. they all mean the same I know. But what the heck, this is my space, my page and my thought. Not going to be edited by some heartless and ruthless english teacher in high school who wouldn’t care less but mark your composed theme with red ink for reasons that you violated one of those shitty grammar rules. Back to my shoutout, it clearly depicts may I say, of how my life, even with my unwillingness, slowly transpired from scenarios of good and happy times to disheartening ones. Sad episodes unfolded one by one right before my very eyes. And i am stuck. Not that I don’t want to move, but in which direction, confuses me greatly. People say that when you hit the bottom, there’s no where else to go but up. But why I’ve never seen this happening yet? 

 

I know you’ve probably heard this more than once in your life but let me reiterate. When I was in my elem. years, I wished i’d graduate so that I could move to the city for high school and widen my crowd so as to slowly get rid of my fraidy little girl image. Came high school, I wished I could fast-forward the years so that I’d hit college and have the time of my life. This time in a much bigger city. When I entered college, I again wanted to end the five-year agony so I could land on a decent job and earn just enough to sustain my partying days. After my first job, I wished again that years would be swift so that I could resign and get a better job in order to afford the necessary gadgets to be at par in this “techie” society as what they call it. A few more months and I’ll be culminating to a five-year stint in this hospital. And then again, i am wishing I could find a much better job than what I have right now. In the hope that this time the pay could afford me a nice-ass condo I mostly see on flyers distributed by some agents in malls or billboards along EDSA.

The truth is, things doesn’t get better along the way. It’s a misconception and misleading. I am not being pessimistic but just realistic. Much to my chagrin, this is how life presents itself. Full of sentiments and compliments. But what i really mean to impart is that appreciate what you have now and do everything as crazy as the famous quotes, sayings or lines from your favorite movies or books teach you because you’re going to miss half of your bloody life when you don’t. Time plays a crucial part, and shouldn’t be taken for granted. 

Despite things getting infinitely worse, I still have God. And when I think about my dad, I think of God. 

of moving on

~ this is the first of my old posts extracted from my old blog site. i especially wrote this for my Dad, in his memory.

Of Moving On…

 January 3, 2008 by lei23-sc | Edit

   

“ I look at life as a gift of God. Now that he wants it back, I have no right to complain”.- Anonymous

 

We don’t have control on most events. We all experience emotional pain in our lives. Someone close to us will eventually die. A friend or a lover will betray us. We will lose our jobs or not get the one we really wanted. And I have difficulty with processing these issues.

 

Two months ago I called my dad wanting to know how he has been being in the hospital. After the usual talk, we said our "take cares" and hung up, not knowing that it would be my last conversation with him. All I knew was that each time I talked to my dad, his voice sounded more tired, and I was beginning to accept that it was no longer if, but when, the day would come that I wouldn’t hear it anymore.

 

My father was the strongest figure in our house. We all depended on him as he ran the house remarkably well the best way he can. He was an intelligent and honest man, quiet and barely associates with people. He takes pleasure in the company of few and chosen ones whom he trusts and depends on. He and my mom was a success in married life. The years had held many valleys and peaks for them as they raised us, their three children.

 

I remember how good it felt when my dad used to cuddle me up on the couch when I was little or carry me in his arms. I can still remember how strong his voice was and how safe I felt. As the youngest, I take pride in saying that I was his favorite, daddy’s girl, yes I was and will always be. As a child, he used to tell me lots of stories and taught me important and essential lessons in life as I grow along. We exchanged opinions and perspectives on political and economic issues ( we both love to read the daily paper). He believed in my strengths and capabilities and showed unwavering support and love as I trudged along the roads of my journey. But most of all, we shared the same dreams, dreams that we created and interwoven as the years we’re passing by on us. I couldn’t explain all of the millions of ways he makes me feel so special.

 

That fateful November 12, my dad passed away suddenly and unexpectedly. I felt my world had stopped and crashed around me. I had my first taste of dealing with death, and losing someone I dearly love. But when I looked at him he looked so happy and serene. He went to Heaven that day. He seemed to know he was going and was happy about it. I rejoice to know that he is there, with Jesus, well and whole, and that I will see him again one day. He has led a simple yet meaningful life that inspires me to live mine to the fullest. 

 

As what in one of the Grey's Anatomy episode conveys, "Time takes pleasure in kicking our assess. Even the strongest of us, it seems to play tricks, slowing down, hovering until it freezes, leaving us stuck in the moment unable to move in one direction or the other. Time flies, time waits for no man. Time heal all wounds. All of us want is more time. Time to stand up, time to grow up. Time to let go. The reality is, pain is there to tell us something."

 

My life has changed dramatically. From now on, I will invest in the people in my life that I care most about. I’ll face life with less fear than I did before, knowing that life only comes around once and somehow things will work out. It is clear that I am more settled person and possesses a true sense of meaning.